Tuesday, February 17, 2009

WTF

Couple of random episodes in my life recently.  First and possibly strangest.  I had straight boy drama at a gay bar!! So, a couple of friends came into town.  I didn't know them well before they came but one has been my cousin's life partner for over a decade and the other is his son.  So when they come to my city of course I set some time aside to meet up with them and show them a few things.  I ended up spending more time than I anticipated with them because they were soo much fun.  We went to a parade then went to party on Bourbon  and Frenchmen St. (locals know that we only really go down to Bourbon when we have guests in town.  Frenchmen is where the locals play)  Anyhow we go dancing on the tourist trap that is Bourbon.  We go to this club and we are dancing it up.  I'm the ish.  I accidently knock over a beer that is on a table behind me.  The guy the beer belongs to looks pretty pissed and it was a full beer before I knocked it over.  So I offer to buy a replacement.  The club is packed and I didn't feel like waiting in line for the bartender so I just hand him a fiver (yes the pauper princess handed over money... what is the world coming to?)  He tells me the beer belongs to his girlfriend and I say well give her my apologies and buy her a new beer.  Shortly after this we leave and since both of my guests are gay we head to one of the gay bars farther down.  I've been here before with other gay friends and it is a treat because half naked men dance on the bar.  Once we were there about an hour I had to use the restroom.  When I come out guess who's there.  Spilled Beer Guy.. He starts coming on to me and telling me how pretty I am.  I ask him where his girlfriend is and he says she's not his girlfriend.  Regardless she wasn't there.  He makes a real nuisance of himself until I agree to dance with him.  He keeps trying to touch me and I am so not having it.   So I know you all have the same question right?  "Why is a straight man in a gay club by himself?  Actually I am more curious about what he did with my $5 if that wasn't his girlfriend!!.  I did say something along the lines of "I know why I'm here, why are you here?  This is not where I come to meet straight men."  I'm guessing he was on the DL.  Crazy straight boy drama at a gay club. Go figure.   I also ended up  having a conversation with two gay men about how they love boobs more than straight men.


Second is a little less exciting but just as random.  Like most hardcore coffee drinkers I can't function fully without my morning coffee. Normally I shell out the cash to buy really good beans and grind my own coffee.  A coffee grinder and French press are one of the best investments ever.  In an emergency I will go to the Starbucks or PJ's coffee around the corner from me.   These early morning trips are few and far between and rarely memorable unless someone impedes my access to coffee.  Well apparently Coffee Deprived Foxxy is very similar to Intoxicated Drunk Foxxy.  I met some guy in the coffee line and gave him my email address.  He waits 3 weeks then emails me.  When I get the email I almost deleted it thinking it was a Nigerian Money Scam.  Even though I can totally understand why a terminally ill Lady would want me to have her money so her greedy relatives can't have it.  Shhhhh she doesn't know I already one the UK lottery like 10 times and have no need for her paltry millions.  I digress...  I'm puzzled by the email.  At this point I don't recall what he looked like and don't think I should be held responsible for what happens in the pursuit of coffee.   But I'm intrigued.  Normally I am quite mean before my coffee fix so I want to know what he did to get past that.  This could be advantageous because mean is being generous.  I'm hell in high heels without my coffee.  Or maybe the mean turned him on which I've seen before.  I would always be dateless if there wasn't a certain breed of men that like a little mean and evil served up on big boobs and dimples. My dilemma is he was obviously cute, funny, weird, or skilled enough for me to give him some form of communication. (I'm not one of those women that gives personal info to some guy she has no intention of speaking to later).  The caveat is maybe he wasn't cute, funny, weird or skilled enough to get my phone number which is the most expedient way to get in contact with me.  It is also possible I gave him my email and not the cell because I wasn't functioning  properly before my coffee.....What's a girl to do?


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