Why is the rum always gone?

So my baby brother (read-27 year old, deputy sheriff) is coming to visit me Memorial Day weekend. I'm excited for the visit because he is one of my favorite people. That doesn't mean that I don't do shit to him, but it is all done with love and a sincere need to see that pissed of look on his face occasionally. Anyway, in preparation for his trip, he mailed me a bottle of a rum. It was a brand I haven't tried so he was being nice enough to mail me a bottle. I did have strict instructions "Don't be tastin' it all up before he gets here". All of that is moot because when I go to pick it up, the package is damaged. I got a soggy box of glass. No fabulous new rum for me. Well my brother had insured the box. So he calls the post office in CA to tell them what happened and they asked him to show them the box. Hello? The box was mailed to LA!! Fools.
Enough about that. It is almost kickball season. That is part of the reason for Jason's visit. He joined my kickball team, The Hangovers, even though he no longer lives here in NOLA. Anyone living in our home town understands why. There really isn't a lot of entertainment there. So he is on the team and will be flying in to play in about 4 games during the course of the season. It will give us a chance to hang out and Do it Big!!! And noone does it big like us. Hopefully while he's here he will pack up and take the rest of his shit that has been taking up space in my apartment for the last year and a half!